Imagine you’ve gotten an ADHD diagnosis (maybe you don’t have to imagine). It’s changed your life. Suddenly questions have answers, challenges have solutions, and your future has a path.
You also have new things to think about, new needs, and new areas where support might help. But for that, you need to tell people.
Sharing an ADHD diagnosis with others is a personal decision, but it can lead to better support and understanding from those around you. If it’s a step you’re considering, read on for some thoughts and tips.
General Tips for Sharing Your ADHD Diagnosis
Educate Yourself First
Before sharing with others, make sure you understand ADHD and how it affects you personally. Using specific examples of symptoms that you struggle with will help you explain it more clearly.
Choose the Right Time and Place
Pick a quiet moment when you can have an uninterrupted conversation. Remove distractions that will keep you from staying focused on the conversation.
Be Prepared for Questions
There are many well-shared misconceptions about ADHD. You may have even believed some of them before receiving your diagnosis. Be ready to address common myths and provide factual information or look up questions together.
Use “I” Statements
Focus on your personal experience rather than general statements about ADHD, not only because ADHD can be different for each person but because personal stories make information easier to relate to.
Be Patient
Understanding ADHD can take time. Think about it as though you and the people in your life are on a journey. Be prepared to keep learning and have ongoing conversations.
Sharing with Family
When it comes to telling the people who love us most or have known us longest, sharing a new diagnosis can come with a bit more emotion. Here are a few ways to navigate that.
Start with Close Family Members
Begin with those you trust most and who are most involved in your daily life. They are likely to be the most supportive and can help you strategize around how to tell others.
Ask for Specific Support
Your family loves you and wants to help. But they may have different ideas about how that looks. Clearly communicate how they can help you manage your ADHD.
Sharing with Friends
Like family, your friends care about you and want what’s best for you. Telling them can be a big part of your ADHD journey.
Choose Friends Wisely
Just like our mothers taught us in middle school, choose carefully. In this case, share first with friends who are understanding and supportive. They’ll not only help you continue to adjust to this diagnosis but also give you the confidence to continue sharing.
Be Casual but Clear
If setting up a formal conversation feels right, maybe because your friend lives far away or you’re both incredibly busy, go for it. But know that you don’t need to make it a formal announcement. It’s completely ok to bring it up naturally in conversation.
Explain How It Might Affect Your Friendship
Or explore how it has already been affecting your friendship. For example, if you sometimes forget plans or struggle with time management, talk with your friend about how you now know why you have these challenges–and how you’re working to make things better.
Sharing in the Workplace
Like sharing with family and friends, sharing your diagnosis in the workplace can also bring up a lot of emotion. It can also increase anxiety and job stress. For a more detailed look at how to share your diagnosis at work and possible accommodations, check out our article Should I Reveal My ADHD at Work?
Know Your Rights
Familiarize yourself with workplace protections for individuals with ADHD, both legally and using information from your company handbook when necessary. It’s good to know the facts as you enter into these conversations.
Decide Who Needs to Know
You may choose to inform only your supervisor or HR department rather than all coworkers. Or you may let those know who you work most closely with. Remember that not everyone needs to know, only those who will help support you along the way.
Focus on Job Performance
Explain how ADHD affects your work, how you are managing your symptoms, and any accommodations that could help you perform better. Your boss and company should want to help you be happy and productive.
Highlight Your Strengths
ADHD often comes with unique strengths like creativity and problem-solving skills. Emphasize these so that you can both begin to work towards removing the ADHD stigma but also so that your boss and coworkers can be on the lookout for projects that are best suited to your unique talents.
Be Professional
Keep the conversation focused on work-related impacts and solutions.
Sharing your ADHD diagnosis can be a powerful step towards building stronger, more understanding relationships. It can lead to better support systems at home, among friends, and in the workplace. Remember, how much you share and with whom is entirely your decision. Take your time, choose your moments, and prioritize your comfort and well-being throughout the process.
Thinking you might need an ADHD Diagnosis? Take our Diagnostic Evaluation to see if ADHD has been getting in your way.
